Dear Coaches: Mindset Isn't Everything

I am beyond tired of healing and coaching models boiling complex circumstances down to mindset work & emotional/mental/healing blocks. There is no way this is the full picture. However, this is a great business model if you want someone to believe they are the problem and they can only change themselves and their circumstances via your program or services.

If a client feels aligned with and inspired by mindset work, breaking through blocks, and doing inner work - yahoo, go for it!

But I’m not talking about that.

I’m talking about mindset work that doesn’t acknowledge systemic oppression, pull-yourself-up-by-your-bootstraps, try harder, get out of your own way, don’t be a victim of your circumstance language and approaches.

I’m talking about reducing a complex, holistic, messy situation into a wholly personal problem.

I’m talking about a client bringing a coach (business, healing, life, whatever!) a criticism (of the coach, a methodology, life, whatever!) & the critique being turned right back around onto the client as a block they need to clear/work through/whatever!

I’m talking about where we are pointing our fucking fingers, and can we please be more thoughtful and careful & intentional about it?

This narrow approach of “you are the problem/I am the problem” can feel empowering, sometimes! We often turn to this when we feel out of control in a situation we need to survive. If I am the problem, then maybe I can solve the problem, and things will get better. Seems easier than changing all these shitty external out-of-our-hands things.

When we look at our selves, we are powerful - yes. When we look at our world and the systems we live in, they are powerful too.

I will not rally behind coaches distilling complex issues into client’s personal problems. It is gross, it is negligent, it is misinformed, and it is harmful.

So what can we do as folks in healing and helping spaces?

Can we follow our clients’ lead on the approaches that best serve them?
Can we strive to be anti-oppressive & learn about systemic injustice?
Can we stop teaching & preaching mindset as a way of bypassing tough realities & collective states?
Can we? Please?

Love/I’ve had it,
Jess

May We Not Bypass These Times

May we not bypass these times.
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May we not bypass pain with silver linings.
May we not bypass truth with platitudes.
May we not bypass oppression with broad strokes of “unity.”
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May we not bypass these times.
May we live in the very moment we are in.
May we acknowledge what is true (the very corrupt, capitalist, white supremacist truth of it) so that we may, in ourselves and in these systems - transform it.

⋒ For more support in compassionate listening, check out my virtual guide, It’s Not All Good! ⋒